IN A MOVE that may please many, Germany are considering a new law which will make it illegal to email your work colleagues after 6pm.

Research commissioned by the German minister for Labour found that refreshing and answering work emails after you’ve clocked out adds an extra five hours to the average office worker’s day. FIVE HOURS. Sneaky.

While we wholeheartedly support this idea, we believe that the true fight to make officer workers happy actually begins in the office itself. Here are some other things they might consider banning…

1. Office jargon

Flickr / Tobias Toft Flickr / Tobias Toft / Tobias Toft

“Touch base.” ”Think outside the box.” ”Going forward.”

An immediate and hefty fine would really be the best option for anyone who uses these phrases.

2. Calling a meeting as people are about to leave

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Come on now.

3. Lunchtime meetings as an entire concept

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The whole idea of lunch is that it is your private time, to eat manky sandwiches and contemplate life.

It is not time to talk endlessly about ‘synergy’. It’s never time to talk about synergy, come to think of it.

4. Smelly food

Flickr / magro-family Flickr / magro-family / magro-family

All tuna sandwiches will be confiscated upon entering the building. Thank you for cooperating.

5. Keyboard smashing

Flickr / Adikos Flickr / Adikos / Adikos

The keyboard is your friend. Please treat it kindly (and spare the ears of your colleagues).

6. Constantly sending ‘funny’ pictures to your colleagues

Maximum of three per day. Otherwise you’re out on your ear, mate. Refer to this handy chart for guidance:

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7. Office fridge violations

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Failure to remove gone-off food in time, leaving crumbs in the butter, putting the milk back in the fridge with the tiniest drop in the carton… Serious repercussions.

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